creative forces

 

Blog # 148…December, 2023

 

Another November’s come and gone, this year bringing an added depth of darkness - both real and existential. We’ve turned the clocks back and put poppies on our lapels to honour fallen soldiers from old wars. Meanwhile, new wars rage in Sudan, Ukraine and Gaza killing civilians against all laws of war and decency. Hard as it is to avoid despair, it’s not an option.  My glass is still half full (not sure of what) and I manage to find the occasional bright spot, or pony as the old joke about optimists and pessimists goes. 

I met Emily Armour several years ago  after she'd discovered a profile of Phyllis Carleton I'd writtten on a University of Toronto alumni website and she contacted me in hopes of finding some connection with her grandmother. Phyl had been  a physiotherapist  practicing in England during World War Two, as had Elizabeth Carroll, Emily’s grandmother...it seemed possible they had met, maybe even worked together. I asked Phyl shortly before her death (at almost 101) and examined various physio contacts but wasn't able to find any evidence of Elizabeth Carroll and the search seemed over. But in the many messages back and forth with Emily, I discovered something wonderful about her passions and her creative talents. 

She’s  a musician and teacher of music in Victoria,  British Columbia and, as well as a curiosity about her grandmother, she has an interest and reverence for other individuals who served in WWll. She searched out some surviving soldiers in and around Victoria and introduced them to her students (aged 8 to 18). Each student was assigned an individual to interview and then compose a  piece of music reflecting the veteran’s experiences during the war and since. Presenting the pieces to the larger group was a poignant experience for both the aging veterans and the young students - and Music for Veterans was born.

The project began in 2021 and most of the original students remain involved, with the addition of some new youngsters. This November they produced their first public event, held in Victoria’s Royal Oak Burial Park, the beautiful spot where Elizabeth Carroll is buried.

Music by the young composers commemorated the lives of eleven local airmen who died in training exercises during the war, never seeing active service and often not recognized in memorial services. Four of the older students then travelled with Emily to Ottawa to perform at a Remembrance Day ceremony on Parliament Hill, where they honoured Indigenous soldiers killed in battle as well as Romeo Dallaire.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

Emily's persistence in searching out traces of her grandmother had led her to discover the obituary of another physiotherapist, Helen Metcalfe who had also served in England. Emily contacted her daughter Sue in Ottawa who remembered her mother mentioning Betty Carroll and even found a photo of Betty treating an injured soldier to send to Emily. While she was in Ottawa for the Remembrance Day event, Emily met Sue and they shared memories of  their beloved grandmother and mother… and the circle closed. 

Since Canada brought in Medical Assistance In Dying (MAID) in June of 2016, more than 40,000 individuals have chosen this way to end their life.  Many family members and friends have participated in conversations about the decision making and other arrangements involved in this important social phenomenon  - new to us all.

Three of my friends have chosen to die with MAID in the past few months, the first sent a message with the reason for his decision and the fact that it would take place in a few days  - giving us a chance to express our affection and what his friendship had meant to us...sad but comforting. As individuals make different choices about their lives, they also do so about their deaths...and maybe the conversations that emerge in discussing MAID will lessen our avoidance of this sensitive topic. 

This starts the holiday season and finishes off 2023. I'm wishing peace and joy to you and for the rest of the world. We'll be back in 2024.