Blog # 148…December, 2023
Another November’s come and gone, this year bringing an added depth of darkness - both real and existential. We’ve turned the clocks back and put poppies on our lapels to honour fallen soldiers from old wars. Meanwhile, new wars rage in Sudan, Ukraine and Gaza killing civilians against all laws of war and decency. Hard as it is to avoid despair, it’s not an option. My glass is still half full (not sure of what) and I manage to find the occasional bright spot, or pony as the old joke about optimists and pessimists goes.
I met Emily Armour several years ago after she'd discovered a profile of Phyllis Carleton I'd writtten on a University of Toronto alumni website and she contacted me in hopes of finding some connection with her grandmother. Phyl had been a physiotherapist practicing in England during World War Two, as had Elizabeth Carroll, Emily’s grandmother...it seemed possible they had met, maybe even worked together. I asked Phyl shortly before her death (at almost 101) and examined various physio contacts but wasn't able to find any evidence of Elizabeth Carroll and the search seemed over. But in the many messages back and forth with Emily, I discovered something wonderful about her passions and her creative talents.
She’s a musician and teacher of music in Victoria, British Columbia and, as well as a curiosity
about her grandmother, she has an interest and reverence for other individuals who served in WWll. She searched out some surviving soldiers in and around Victoria
and introduced them to her students (aged 8 to 18). Each student was assigned an individual to interview and then compose a piece of music reflecting the
veteran’s experiences during the war and since. Presenting the pieces to the
larger group was a poignant experience for both the aging veterans and the young students -
The project began in 2021 and most of the original students remain involved, with the addition of some new youngsters. This November they produced their first public event, held in Victoria’s Royal Oak Burial Park, the beautiful spot where Elizabeth Carroll is buried.
Music by the young composers commemorated the lives of eleven local airmen who died in training exercises during the war, never seeing active service and often not recognized in memorial services. Four of the older students then travelled with Emily to Ottawa to perform at a Remembrance Day ceremony on Parliament Hill, where they honoured Indigenous soldiers killed in battle as well as Romeo Dallaire.Emily's persistence in searching out traces of her grandmother had led her to discover the obituary of another physiotherapist, Helen Metcalfe who had also served in England. Emily contacted her daughter Sue in Ottawa who remembered her mother mentioning Betty Carroll and even found a photo of Betty treating an injured soldier to send to Emily. While she was in Ottawa for the Remembrance Day event, Emily met Sue and they shared memories of their beloved grandmother and mother… and the circle closed.
Since Canada brought in
Medical Assistance In Dying (MAID) in June of 2016, more than 40,000 individuals have chosen this way to end their life. Many family members and friends have participated
in conversations about the decision making and other arrangements involved in this important social
phenomenon - new to us all.
Three of my friends have chosen to die with MAID in the past few months, the first sent a message with the reason for his decision and the fact that it would take place in a few days - giving us a chance to express our affection and what his friendship had meant to us...sad but comforting. As individuals make different choices about their lives, they also do so about their deaths...and maybe the conversations that emerge in discussing MAID will lessen our avoidance of this sensitive topic.
This starts the holiday season and finishes off 2023. I'm wishing peace and joy to you and for the rest of the world. We'll be back in 2024.
The research into the fallen soldiers is so interesting. It is wonderful to honour these people with music. What a great project, and so comforting to those involved. On your second topic MAiD, I am of two minds. I was supportive at first, as I do believe an individual should have control of what happens to their body and life. Of course they should be able to decide when they want to leave. But it is clear that there are people who are ending their lives because they cannot afford to live in this modern world, and that is wrong. I don't trust this present day government with moral or financial decisions. They are chaotic, self serving and ultimately they are destroying our country as we know it.
ReplyDeleteYour first entry reminds me of when as a member of the University Settlement Choir, we sang to a group of veterans at Sunnybrooke Hospital. That was a rewarding experience. I am also reminded of my father's service in both the Canadian and U.S. Airforces. He trained as a Morse Code operator but never saw active duty
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